About this blog right here. Uh huh...

Some people call my luv of mangoes 'a fetish'. Meh. I say it's gone way beyond that! This blog's my homage to the succulent fruit - memoirs, poetry, random thoughts, pics & anything mango-related I can get my tongue on.

Sunday, December 9

The Enthusiasm of Mangoes...

england, winter, mangoes

I'm finding it a tad tricky keeping up with this blog, to write about mangoes on a regular basis - main reason being that I feel more inspired to write when I've eaten a mango, when I see boxes upon boxes of them in the market.

It's winter in London - so only a few varieties are being imported compared to the summer when you can convince yourself you're in a tropical country due to the sheer amount & variety of mangoes available.

I think I'm a sensory person where mangoes are concerned. Imagining them is a lot different than actually smelling them, digging your teeth into its flesh, getting your hands sticky, picking the strands out of your teeth, maybe exhaling a gloriously-smelling mango burp afterwards, hehe!

Anyway, have a nice week...


(img credit: lemuelinchrist)

Tuesday, December 4

Can't wait for the summer...

summer, can't wait

I miss the taste of fresh mangoes. I really do. What we commonly have in England at the moment, with it being winter, are those huge ones you get in most supermarkets – I think they're called Atkins.

I miss walking through Green Street market over the summer, brushing my eyes over the variety of mangoes piled up succulently - Honey mangoes, Ghana mangoes, Julie mangoes – walking round the market to find the best value for money, getting home, sitting down with a big bowl of them and eating 'til my stomach looks like it's with child.

I might have to start travelling, during winter, to places where mangoes are in season – if I could afford to, I would.

I don't feel like having the standard mangoes you get in Sainsbury's and Morrison's though sometimes they can be nice. There's a continental market that sets up outside Stratford station for a couple of days every 3 months or so – there's a guy that sells dried organic mango slices there – the organic ones taste better than the non-organic ones, especially if you have a sour tooth. The non-organic ones just taste sickly-sweet to me.

Yeah. I think I might treat myself. Go pick up a bag of those. See if it'll soothe my craving - and cheer me up a bit.

I really can't wait for the summer. I'm a Summer baby - born in June. I was made for mangoes :-)


(img credit: aussiegall)

Sunday, November 18

A Mango a day Keeps Diabetes Away...

mango, diabetes

Well it might in the future according to this science article.

Yep, as well as protecting against high cholesterol.

Apparently, there are compounds unique to tropical fruit like mangoes and papaya that basically 'act on the same pathways that diabetes and cholesterol drugs target'.

Wow! Now that's slapped a wide biggadocious smile on my face.


(img credit: Flashpacking Life)

Friday, November 2

Mango Haiku (4)...

mango-made earrings
mirror reflects the true her:
a brown-skinned goddess

© mango.FReak

Thursday, October 18

She's Worried - That Means She Must Love Me!

I have a friend who, after several years, is now starting to really understand my obsession with mangoes.

And she sounded worried.

Really worried.

Oh dear. Things might never be the same between us! :-)

[ps: my nephew's just asked me 'Aunty, what's a 'Mego Freak?' - bless 'em, he meant 'Mango Freak'.]

Monday, September 24

Eat Mangoes Naked...

hmm, that's something i haven't tried - well... not in front of Denzel Washington anyway! So I'm sending it out into the universe. Universe, I'd like to eat mangoes naked in front of Mr Washington. And Universe, I'd like to think he'd like that too.

mmm... man-goes, den-zel, same amount of syllables. no coincedence.

Actually, I have eaten a mango naked - well, almost. I was up at Glastonbury festival in June. My friend Helen (the one that always gets me mango stuff when she stays round mine) surprised me with a nice big mango. I was over the f**king moon.

I saved it for breakfast - me, myself and I, zipped up in my tent, gladly closed off from the hustle & bustle of Glastonbury, eating my mango, in my panties & bra, with my belly hanging out. It was DIVINE, darling, divine. I was totally in my element. :-)


Tuesday, September 18

aaaand another Mango Haiku (3)...


chest rises and falls
mmm, her early-morning breath
smells of sweet mangoes

© mango.FReak

(p.s: in case you're wondering, haiku is an ancient form of Japanese poetry consisting of 17 syllables - 1st line must be 5 syllables, 2nd line 7 syllables, 3rd line 5 syllables. I like haiku. I like the challenge.)

Saturday, September 15

Erm, Do You Know I Have a Mango Shrine?

Oh yeah. The freak in me goes deeper than you think. ;-)

There is no cure. And why would I want one? Pray tell me.

Anyway, check out my very own mango shrine. (Update - 19/3/10: I did have a mango shrine. Honest, I did. Was an online mostly-pictorial homage to my favourite sunshine fruit. I'll probably recreate it at some point).

I bid you adeiu...

mango.FREAK'oid (aka ebele)

Thursday, September 13

Mango Activist...

I had these badges made for me - I wear them everywhere now - have 3 strapped on like i'm some kinda soldier and in a way, yeah, i am - i'm a mango soldier, a mango activist - the lara croft of the mango world!, travelling tirelessly round the globe to save mangoes from extinction!

Come to think of it, i think i'll be like Blade instead - maybe not as miserable though - creeping out of the shadows in my stealth leather jacket to kick apples out of people's hands!


Sunday, September 9

Mango Haiku (2)...


mango thief is caught
"I'm sorry" just won't cut it
Judge says: off with tongue


Friday, September 7

True Story...

I was in New York last year - on holiday for a couple of weeks - with my sister - Upper Westside - 82nd street or so.

There were a lot of homeless people, beggars - no different than London really. One of them was a girl. I call her a girl because she was. She looked very young - couldn't have been older than 14. So young.

Sleeping next to a shop.

Dirty. Very dirty. Like she'd been down a chimney sweep. The dirt didn't hide her childhood. And the fact that she was a beautiful child. And the worrying fact that she may never grow up to be a balanced young woman with a whole world of opportunities at her feet.

I didn't know what to do for her.

So I placed a couple of dollars in her curled hand

...and a mango.

And walked away...

knowing that neither one of them would be enough.

I'm sorry I couldn't save you

Put warm food in your belly
Wash your face
Bathe you
Clothe you
Hug you

Tell you "you're safe now".


Monday, September 3

Mango Haiku (1)


approach with caution
carnivorous mango tree
7 goats missing

© mango FReak - '07

Sunday, September 2

My Nephew Thinks Dried Mangoes Stink....

What is wrong with the boy?

I think I might take him to the doctor's for a check-up.

There must be a cure.

(Hey, Kaptain Krayola, wipe that smug look off your face. Grrr...)


Thursday, August 30

The Best Way to Eat a Mango...

With your bare hands.

Using a fork is too polite.

Get your fingers dirty. It's allowed. It's fun. It's freeing. Makes you feel playful. And alive. And messy. And, yes, messy is good. Try it.

Make sure you lick your fingers afterwards. Don't wipe 'em with a cloth. Lick them.

Remember licking off the dough from mum's bowl, fighting over it with your siblings to get your little grubby hands on it? Remember that first comforting moreish lick?

Remember playing water fights, pillow fights, snow fights, playing in the sand, in the rain - not caring if you got soaked through, or got feathers in your hair, or sand in your mouth, or if mud became your middle name? When it really didn't matter if mum threw a complete fit when she saw the state of you?

That's the kind of abandon you need when eating a mango.


Tuesday, August 28

If I Had a Magic Wand...

...this is what I'd like to do...

1) travel to at least one continent (or two) tasting the different varieties of mangoes!

2) use my love of mangoes to help people (for e.g., to economically empower women in the (re)developing world by helping them gain a share of mango plantations)

3) organise a community mango festival every year (with the proceeds going to the above)

4) write as many poems under as many mango trees as I can!

5) Organise a mango-poetry & tasting night (or a Mango & Chocolate tasting night! Or a Mango, Chocolate & Male Stripper night! Mmmm....)

6) Make & sell mango t-shirts, badges, keyrings with mango slogans like Mango Freak, Mangoes that go ‘Oh’, Mango Breath.

7) Find out how old the oldest mango tree is (and whether it can be grafted to grow new ones)

mango FReak fo' lyfe.

Saturday, August 25

You Know When You've Been Mangoed :-)

There's this friend of mine - Helen. She always buys me mango stuff when she comes round - even during winter. I wanna marry the woman for the sheer generosity of her gestures, but, alas, she's spoken for :-( (sniffle, sniffle)

Anyway, moving on...

Everytime she comes round, she always brings me something mango - the last time, it was Lush 'you've been mangoed' bath melt - before that, it was Del Monte's mango smoothie ice lolly - and before that, half a box of mangoes! I need to invite this woman to mine, like, everyday!

(BACKGROUND THOUGHT: Is there something Helen did to me in a past lifetime? - that she's (subconsciously) making up for? - did she slay me in a past life & bury my limp body under a mango tree? - I FORGIVE YOU, HELEN, I FORGIVE YOU - WHAT'S THAT?, YOU STILL FEEL BAD?, SO BAD YOU WANNA BUY ME MORE MANGOES? ERM.... OK THEN. :-) )

mango FReak for life

Thursday, August 23

A swarm of mango trees...

I see mango trees all around me,
the only fruit on the island.

Their colours seduce me.

This is the rainbow I wanted.
The one I asked my Mother for.
I thought She'd forgotten
but She was listening all along,
knitting it into Her quilt.

Teeth sink into orange flesh
and a million orgasms explode
in my mouth.

Sticky fingers.
Full belly.
Appeased tongue.

My hands   run over
the rough-smooth texture
of the oldest mango tree
as she bears
her last fruit.

© mango FReak.

Wednesday, August 22

Grrr...my nephew doesn't like mangoes...

...he had a nibble...

....and that was it.

Said it was sweet & bitter.  Bitter? What do you mean BITTER. Just because it doesn't taste like chicken mcnuggets doesn't mean it's bitter. Grrrr...

Ok, Ok, I ain't gonna lie - I was relieved I didn't have to share, but c'mon, how can my own flesh and blood not like mangoes?

My nephew's 7 by the way. Adorable eyes. Big big head. I call him isi opiolo which means mango head. Maybe he's rebelling against me for calling him that. I'm proud of him really - for his rebellious nature - just that he picked the wrong fruit to make a point with.

So I shall try again. Get a different variety. No family member of mine shall have blaise tastebuds when it comes to mangoes - oh no.

To be continued...

© mango FReak

Monday, August 20

Love is...

a heart
So, I was at a poetry event last night - really good - and one of the poets asked the audience to sum up 'Love' in one word...

...and I said 'Mangoes'.

What?   What's wrong with that?

Then someone else said 'Unconditional' and the poet oooh'ed and aaah'ed over that word for like a day. I'm like 'What about me?', 'What about meeeeeeeeee?'

Anywayz, deep down inside, I'm thinking she must have really liked my response 'cos she gave me one of her books - a gift - signed and everything! She wrote inside:

Love & Beauty = You.

YOU HEAR THAT, PEOPLE? Luuuuurve + Beaulee Equals ME! Ooooh Weeee!

Please show her some mango-lurve by passing through her site. Her name's Michelle Marie Clarke-Campbell. And her book's called Black Honey.

a mango in all of y'all's palms...

mango FReak.

Saturday, August 18


...and IT.IS. guuuuuuuuuuuud...

My sister bought 9 of them for £2. £2, people!

Now THAT'S a bargain if I ever did see one.

...and I didn't realise just how much I loved my sister 'til she came waltzing in with 9 medium-sized suns in a blue plastic bag.

And there's this guy on TV 'SHOUTING' the word of God like people can't turn up the volume if they needed to hear him better....

...and his whiny voice doesn't irritate me. No.

'cos I'm having me some mango.

I'm about to have another one

but before that, I'm gonna have a lamb patty

in order to appreciate the contrast.

And now the guy on TV is singing - really bad

...but that doesn't irritate me.

I love my sister - I will let her watch what she wants.

And my nephew's just plowed his skinny body through a McDonalds chicken sandwich and 6 chicken nuggets without offering any to me or his mum.

...and that doesn't bother me either.

I have found my zen.

mango FReak

Friday, August 17

Thank you, Jesus!

Someone who understands!

The pull,
the lull,
the craving,
the peak,
the sigh

The pull,
the lull,
the craving,
the peak,
the sigh

The pull,
the lull,
the craving,
the peak,
the sigh...

Check out what I mean.

mango FReak.

Wednesday, August 15

Too Many Mangoes? Neveeeeer....

I just came across this site called Too Many Mangoes.

My first reaction was: Hell no. You crazy? There can NEVER be too many mangoes.

But anyway...

A couple of clicks later and my shoulders slumped. Thought I'd found me a fellow mango freak!

But alas, no. It just seems to be the name of the site and nothing else - can't see any references to mangoes. There's a picture of cranberries (yippee-fucking-yey), but NO MANGOES! Grrrr...

but I shall not let it get me down

I shall not imagine what I could have done with such a name if it was mine

I shall not send Mr 'Too Many Mangoes' threatening emails saying WHY FOR THE LOVE OF GOD - WHHHHYYYYYYIIII?

I shall not direct swarms of spam his way

I shall not paint his door mango-yellow

I shall not turn his eyeballs into mangoes
because then I might eat them
and then he definitely won't be able to 'see' the error of his ways

I shall not let it get me down

I shall think good thoughts

good good thoughts

like soaking my feet in warm mango puree and ginger

like being fed mangoes by Denzel Washington

like winning a year's supply of dried organic mango slices ('cos they're so damn expensive)

like writing beneath a mango tree

like making love beneath a mango tree

like not being able to step out my front door 'cos there are a gazillion tons of mangoes waiting to interview my tongue.

Good thoughts.

mango FReak

Nigeria. 1981.

I was 7 yrs old then. Had just arrived from England.

Everything fascinated me. From the lizards that would nod a 'howdy do' as they passed me by - to the cockroaches who were really black butterflies. And I watched goats bleat 7 times before pushing beautiful small dark balls of shit out their butts - and watched the way these dark pellets would cascade to the ground and settle in a unique constellation.

a mango
I can't remember exactly when I met my 1st mango but I can imagine I was probably going about my business (as most Little Miss 7 yr olds do) - and the mango came bouncing along saying 'eat me' and I said 'are you sure?' and it said 'Mm-hmm'. So I did.

And the sun shone through my little belly for the rest of the day.

That night, like most nights, when there was yet another sudden electricity cut and my grandmother felt her way around for the kerosene lamp, I told her not to worry tonight...we wouldn't be needing it...

...as I patted my stomach - ready to release the sun out of my belly button.

© mango FReak

If you were a mango, I'd suck you...

Sweet, juicy, ripe
I'd lick you

Over too soon
I'd regurgitate you
just to relive the experience

Don't care if I get a running stomach
I want all of you

Even if my shit turns mangoey-green
I want all of you

Orange stains on my white blouse
I want all of you

You - my emotional laxative

I've seen a pumpkin
turn into a coach
and rats
turn into coachmen
So I see no reason why
you can't turn into a mango

'cos the 1st deadly sin
I'd gladly commit for you

Your gluttonous concubine
I'm obsessed with you

Raid every fruit store
from India to Africa
to stock up on you

Chutney, salad, smoothie
Get gastronomically sensual with you

Turn Buckingham Palace
into a mango plantation

I dare her to defy you...

© mango FReak


...that in Hinduism, the mango tree is considered to be sacred because Prajapati, the Lord of Creatures, was changed into a mango tree.


Fellow Mango FReakoids...

* Marney Makridakis
* Whisper of Madness [a salivating description of a mango]
* FreshMangos.com
* Gift Mangoes
* National Mango Board


My Nemesis ;-(

* Kaptain Krayola